1. |
Skit #1: Initiation
02:49
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2. |
Twizzlers
02:26
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All day, I listen to this shit
I'm sick of everything they did
I know it's nothing in the end
Let's go and bring all of our friends
And I'll never get caught up with you again
I don't want to fall into this life
All night, I think I'm gonna stay
Alright? I'll party either way
I know this time will ever end
Let's go and do it all again
And I'll never get caught up with you again
I don't want to fall into this life
Your words are so pointless
I don't understand why you're spending all your time
Just trying to prove what is right
(Let it go!) Don't throw away your life
(Let it go!) Forget it all tonight
(Let it go!) Don't throw away your life
(Let it go!) Forget it all tonight
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3. |
Skit #2: Byclops Begins
00:43
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4. |
Web-Slinger
02:47
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You never would expect this from me
Now I know it's right
And everything that used to hold me down's
The reason why I even try
It's not the kind of life I planned out in my mine
But now's the time to save what's yours and mine
And I'll hand over everything
Just please remember this of me
And just let go of all we've known
I'll take this one; you'll make it out on your own
I wish I could explain what's going down
When I'm away
You're better off when I am not around
Please know it's useless if I stay
It's not the kind of life I planned out in my mind
But now's the time to save what's yours and mine
And I'll hand over everything
Just please remember this of me
And just let go of all we've known
I'll take this one; you'll make it out on your own
And I'll hand over everything
Just please remember this of me
And just let go of all we've known
I'll take this one; you'll make it out on your own
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5. |
The Other Night
02:24
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The other night, I was invited to a party
Don't know why, 'cause I'm not friends with anybody there
This celebration has no meaning
I don't see why they would need me
Wasting time when I don't even care
When I decided maybe I should go
This girl outside demanded me to take her home
She talked the whole way there
She kissed me when we got to the stairs
Tomorrow night, we're gonna see
This local band at the F.P.T.*
They sound much better than most people say
And when they play our favorite song
We know it won't last very long
Before the crowd will force them off the stage
As long as you're with me
It doesn't matter where we go
As long as you're with me
It doesn't matter where we go
When I decided maybe I should go
This girl outside demanded me to take her home
She talked the whole way there
She kissed me when we got to the stairs
*Featured Players Theater in Dothan, Alabama
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6. |
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7. |
The Candle Man
03:23
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Hey, Mr. Candle Man
I'm your biggest candle fan
I wanna hold your candle hand
so take me to your Candle Land
Candles don't have S.T.D.s
so I'll get on my hands and knees
make a wish and close my eyes
and blow a flame that never dies
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love, 'cause The Candle Man can
Put your candle in my cake
and tell me what do candles make
Show me how your candle-sacks
produce all this candle wax
Candles don't have S.T.D.s
so I'll get on my hands and knees
make a wish and close my eyes
and blow a flame that never dies
(Zach:)
*GASP!* Candle Man!
(Candle Man:)
Hey, Mr. Amory
You're the only guy who believes in me
but we can save this world in need
if only you would spread my seed
Don't worry about my S.T.D.s
it only burns when you pee
so take my hand, and this world shall see
that we can live in harmony and shit
(Zach:)
You guys see this shit?
It's the fucking Candle Man, in OUR STUDIO!
I told you he was real, bitches!
(Josh:)
Uhh...what are you pointing at, Zach?
Look guys, Zach's kinda freaking me out right now.
(Dallas:)
Wait... Shut the fuck up, Josh...
I can FEEL him!
I think...I BELIEVE!
(guitar solo)
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love, 'cause The Candle Man can
(Choir:)
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love with The Candle Man
I'm in love, 'cause The Candle Man can
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8. |
Catching On
02:48
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I don't know what I was thinking
To believe that you were changing
But your mind is the only thing
And you'll never be the same
I don't care what you are saying
Every breath that you are wasting
'Cause I know everything you've done
And you'll never be the same
It's okay; I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
And I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
I'm aware of what they're saying
Catching on to how you're changing
'Cause we know everything you've done
And you'll never be the same
It's okay; I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
And I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
Whoever's next in line is better off next time
Whoever's next in line is better off
Whoever's next in line is better off next time
Whoever's next in line is better off
It's okay; I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
And I don't wanna be part of this anymore
'Cause it's never gonna be just what it was before
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9. |
Boneless Chuck
02:35
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I tried to hold it back and keep this to myself
Instead, I'd tell you things I said but never felt
But now, you bring him down, and you go on with your life
I realize that I was right
'Cause you go down on all the guys
You said, "I'm feeling sick, so I'll just stay home tonight"
He said, "Well, that's okay, Babe. I hope you'll be alright"
But he knows what's going on
Yeah, you really get around
He doesn't have the guts to say what he found out
When you left him waiting by the stairs
He should have known you'd be gone
Yeah, he knows the reason you weren't there
But you're all he's got, and it's just too hard to move on
The time is adding up, and he wonders what it's for
This place is not the same as it was a year before
And now, he's had enough of the shit you put him through
He's known for way too long about the things you do
Because you left him waiting by the stairs
He should have known you'd be gone
Yeah, he knows the reason you weren't there
You're all he's got, but now it's time to move on
Now it's time to move on
Now it's time to move on
Now it's time to move on
And now, there's no one waiting by the stairs
You should have known he'd be gone
Yeah, you know the reason he's not there
He's all you've got, and it's just too bad, so move on
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10. |
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11. |
G.F.Y.
02:46
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You waste your time, just trying to keep up with them
They're not really your friends
You just follow their trends
And I can't stand how you look down on the ones
Who don't fall for your lies
They just live their own lives
So take a look at yourself
You think you're someone, but you're just like everyone else
Yeah, take a look at yourself
'Cause you're no better than me
You only wish you could be
You'll never be alright with how it turned out
You only do as they say
They love you if you obey
It makes me sick how you'll throw away everything
Just so the one's that you've got
Will like you for who you're not
So take a look at yourself
You think you're someone, but you're just like everyone else
Yeah, take a look at yourself
'Cause you're no better than me
You only wish you could be
And I'll be okay
'Cause even when the fads wear off, my friends will stay
And when you're afraid
The people that you trust will turn around and walk away
So go fuck yourself
You think you're someone, but you're just like everyone else
Yeah, go fuck yourself
'Cause you're no better than me
You only wish you could be
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12. |
Skit #5: Man of Grass
00:57
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13. |
Grass Man
02:37
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Zach: Don't pollute, 'cause it is bad
Dallas: Or the Grass Man will come...and rape your dad
Zach: He'll eat your soul...with his FINGERS
Dallas: Because they are his "soul eaters"
Zach: He'll fuck you in the face, then he'll fuck you in the ass
Dallas: Because you fucked with his fucking grass
Zach: So don't leave your garbage on the ground
Dallas: Or the Grass Man's dick will slap you down
Chorus:
I used to go without a care
With pollution every day
But the Grass Man came into my life
And he showed me a better way
Zach: Little Timmy was walking home from school
Dallas: He threw some trash on the ground
Zach: That CRAZY FOOL
Dallas: The Grass man arose from the depths of hell
Zach: And kicked little Timmy in the balls
Dallas: Timmy just dropped to his knees and cried
Zach: 'cause all of his sperm...died
Zach: He was late for dinner that night, and his father asked him, "Where the fuck have you been, you little faggot?" and started beating him repeatedly with a fire poker as he continued, "You faggot piece of shit! I wish you had died instead of your mother!" Timmy cried himself to sleep that night, and the next day, he was hit by a bus! His father never had a chance to apologize and express the true pride he felt for his son...
Chorus:
I used to go without a care
With pollution everyday
But the Grass Man came into my life
And he showed me a better way
Zach and Dallas chanting: Grass Man! Grass Man! Grass Man! Grass Man!
Grass Man: Hey, little bitches, it's the Grass Maaaaan! Here we go! Check my flow, muthah fuckahhs!
I'm the Grass Man
I came from the underworld
I'm here to rip off the nuts of you boys and girls
You trashin' my turf
Now that ain't right
So I'm gonna eat yo' balls tonight
Don't get me wrong
I'm not mean
I just don't like it when you trash my green
When I watch you throw away your trash and miss
I wanna drown you in Grass man piss
I used to go without a care
With pollution everyday
But the Grass Man came into my life
And he showed me a better way
'Cause the grass man is rad
And I want to be rad
Pollution is bad
And that's not rad at all
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14. |
Battle Song
02:17
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All this time I spent
Taking hits and giving in
I never thought we would end up this way
But now I'm not the one
And everything's already gone
Now, there's nothing left to say
I just don't understand, so
Tell me now
Just why you're still around
I'm fucked this time
You've got me in this state of mind
I can't let go
I wish I never met you
So now you're here again
And telling me it's not the end
But I won't wait around until you need me
It's harder to forget
When you face me with my regrets
Just turn your back on me and leave
I just don't understand, so
Tell me now
Just why you're still around
Fucked this time
You've got me in this state of mind
I can't let go
I wish I never met you
Tell me now
Just why you're still around
Fucked this time
You've got me in this state of mind
I can't let go
I wish I never met you
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15. |
Skit #6: Let's Fuck!
00:56
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16. |
Laura
02:31
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When I first met you
I didn't think you'd ever lead me by the hand
How did I get you
It's a wonder, and I'll never understand
You were the purest
Always getting me with everything you said
Can someone cure this
Now, it's a poison, and it's rushing through my head
You were the best thing that ever got me this far down
You could have done so much better
But I wish I got away with it somehow
You really got me
Everybody says it goes away in time
But maybe not me
I found the one that was impossible to find
You were the best thing that ever got me this far down
You could have done so much better
But I wish I got away with it somehow
And I'll never look back and regret
Everything that I'll never forget
Even if I have nothing to show
It was the best thing that I'll ever know
You were the best thing that I'll ever know
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17. |
Buttsuckers
01:48
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They all say
"Put the punk shit away
No one here can relate
Can't you see it's dead"
Maybe they're right
We should all sound alike
Just forget who you are
Be hardcore instead
'Cause in this scene
No one knows what I mean
And they find it obscene
When they laugh in their face
They take these things so seriously
Guess it's how you gotta be to fit in this place
Don't even try
'Cause we're not the same
Go on; deny
This moment of change
The time is now
And the scene is going down
'Cause we're fucking up this town
With our pop punk shit
So just get out
If you don't like the sound
'Cause we're gonna stick around
And we'll never quit
I won't stand by
As we fall in line
And the world lives out a lie
Don't forget what's right
Fuck all the fads
Just remember what you had
And don't ever turn your back on your own life
Don't even try
'Cause we're not the same
Go on; deny
This moment of change
You hide behind the people just like you
Fed up with lies, it's time to break through
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18. |
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Well, I was chillin' at my grandma's and eatin' on shrooms
Then her best friend, Maggie, came into the room
She was 80 years old and lookin' 79
Her decayin' hips a-swayin' and her boobies draggin' behind
And I said
Saggy bitches is what I want
Saggy titties and saggy cunts
Saggy bitches is all I need
So come on, Granny, let's fuck and smoke the weed
I was hangin' at the bingo hall and eatin' more shrooms
Then someone squeezed my ass and said
"Hey, guess who"
I turned around to see Saggy Maggie smilin' at me
And she said, "Young Stud, I think we need some privacy"
Then I said
Saggy bitches is what I want
Saggy titties and saggy cunts
Saggy bitches is all I need
So come on, Granny, get on your hands and knees
Saggy bitches is what I want
Saggy titties and saggy cunts
Saggy bitches is all I need
So come on, Maggie, won't you marry me
Maggie: I will!
Zach: Really?
Maggie: Of course I'll marry you!
Zach: That's wonderful news!
Maggie: Now, come on, let's fuck!
Zach: You got it, Baby!
Maggie: Take off that Rastafarian wig, and let's FUCK!
Zach: Okay, here we go!
Zach and Maggie: ...AGH!
(Continuing sex sounds during instrumental break)
I'll help you wipe your ass every night
Caress you down just the way that you like
Let you chain me up against the wall
And do the thing where you tase my balls
I'll do it all, do it all alright
I'll love you for the last couple weeks of your life
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19. |
Skit #7: Revenge!
06:07
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Pink for President Birmingham, Alabama
An alternative rock band from the southeast, Pink for President consists of Zach Amory (vocals/guitar), Dallas Welk (guitar), Damon Delmont (bass), and Eric Hoen (drums). The quartet elaborates on the punk rock genre with various musical styles and is known for adding comedy and world-building to all of their creative outlets. ... more
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